Who is responsible for Birth Control: the Man or the Woman?

Dangote’s Son In-Law, who recently got married Welcomes Son with Ex-Girlfriend, and has allegedly refused to take responsibilities for the little boy.

I see comments from Nigerian women blaming the woman for getting pregnant.

“Women Stop forcing men to fathers when they are not ready”.

“Women Stop trapping men with pregnancy”.

“She should have used protection”.

It was a bit annoying because most of these comments blaming the woman, were made by women. I mean, why should you put the burden on the woman?

A man has sex without protection, the woman gets pregnant and you say she trapped him with pregnancy. Are you thinking straight? How does a woman trap a man with pregnancy? How does a woman force a man into fatherhood, by getting pregnant from an action both of them participated in? Oh! so he doesn’t  know the consequences of engaging in unprotected sex, abi?

Okay, they say she refused to have an abortion, despite him begging her to have one, hence she should be ready to take on the responsibilities of the child alone. Excuse me, he wasn’t raped. So why should she be forced to take responsibility alone, for an act that two people willingly participated in? Sorry, that excuse does not set the man free from his responsibilities towards the child.

Anyone who has sexual activity that may result in pregnancy, has a responsibility for birth control. Dear Naija women, you cannot trap a man with pregnancy. We need to stop saying that. When two adults take a risk, both bear the consequences.

If you are not ready for a child, the onus is on you to take steps to prevent it. Stop passing that responsibility to women. You cannot rely on the woman to take care of your contraception. She can forget to take her pill. Contraception is not a woman’s responsibility. It takes two to tango, so both partners are equally responsible for contraception to prevent pregnancy.

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